Naked in Dangerous Places by Cash Peters

Author:Cash Peters
Language: eng
Format: mobi, epub
Tags: Travel
ISBN: 9780307396358
Publisher: Three Rivers Press
Published: 2009-01-02T00:00:00+00:00

The show premiered four weeks later. On my birthday, as a matter of fact, June 6. A coincidence everyone was quick to label a lucky omen.

It's hard to encapsulate in a single word the myriad feelings that surge through you when you first appear on TV in your very own series, but, after much thought, I can honestly say that “YIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPEEEEEEE!!!!” probably comes the closest.

Quick off the mark, The Thumb sent me a congratulatory note. In it, he went to the trouble of listing some other significant events that had taken place on the same date throughout history, which I thought was a wonderful gesture.

Were you aware that June 6 is Memorial Day in South Korea? I wasn't. Or that some people celebrate the Feast of Saint Norbert of Gennep on that day? Or that it marks a number of epic watersheds: the D-Day landings in Normandy (1944), the death of Robert F. Kennedy (1968), the launch of Soyuz 11 (1971), and Roosevelt's New Deal (1934)? Not to mention the birth of Tony Yeboah, Ada Kok, and James “Munky” Shaffer? (Just thinking aloud, but it's possible I may be the most famous person ever born on June 6. And I'm not famous at all!)

Then, at the very bottom, tagged onto these momentous events, was a personal note: “Cash, congratulations on the launch of this incredible endeavor!!”

He even called me at home as the initial episodes were about to air, very excited as always. “Did you get my gift?”

Oh boy. My own show and a gift, too!

“No,” I said, “I didn't. Is it a car?”

I'd read about networks handing out Porsches to stars as a thank-you for taking time out from their busy celebrity schedule to show up to work …

“No, it's not a car,” he replied, shocked.

… just not this network, evidently.

Still hopeful, in case he was kidding, I hurried downstairs to the front door and found, waiting for me on the step outside …

An envelope.

“Oh.”

Inside was a gift voucher. For four free massages at a spa in West Hollywood.

Hm. Okay.

Sweet gesture.

Please don't think I didn't appreciate it, because I did. Spas are lovely. I like spas.

And anyway, it's the thought that counts, right?

But…

Actually, there is no but. Spa treatments make a great gift.

It's just that…

A car would have been nicer, that's all I'm saying.

Now, let's move on and put this ugly scene behind us.

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